I haven’t shared any stories with you all for quite a while. I was thinking of what I wanted to share with you all next. This past weekend I had asked friends, family, and of course my readers to give me a one word topic to write about. My mother was among the many that had participated in this challenge to myself. She gave me the one topic word: Mother. I was going to write a poem about her, but I’ll wait for Mother’s Day for that. So I decided to share something about how my mother influenced me, and a story of my siblings and I scaring the crap out of her. If you’d like to check out my other one word topic posts then here they are: Forbidden Love, From the Dead, Purgatory, and Within.

My mother is my sole inspiration for being who I am unapologetically. She is a strong woman who have always been who she was and always told me and my siblings to be the same. We live in a world where many disapprove of individuality. We’re forced to be shut in some box filled with stereotypes, and societal beliefs of what one should behave and look like. I am a black woman that grew up in what people would call “the hood.” As a black person, we are stuck in a box filled with negative stereotypes that doesn’t fit all black people, only some. But the media plays us all out to be the same. It doesn’t just stop there, but black people also encounter judgment, ridicule, and stereotypes in our own community.

I was picked on and bullied from time to time growing up because I was different. Not only because I was one of the tallest people, let alone girls in any class, but because I was quiet and liked different things. I was always into dark things, deep thinking, and always had my head in a book. When it came to ditching class in high school it was to go to Borders or a local library to read books that weren’t in my school. Books were my escape bit of a hard life. My taste in music was also different. While it was known for blacks to only be into hip hop, rap, and R&B; I was into heavy metal, alternative rock, and pop music.

It was hard to connect with other individuals because of those things. Not many liked to read, none were interested in that type of music, and most ditched to do other things. Eventually I did find people who were similar to me in many ways later on. And through it all I never once felt like it was wrong for me to be this way regardless of the things people would say to me or about me.

My mother instilled this in me and I grew up confident in being different. I learned that being like other people was a false way of living and it was quite boring. Everyone wanted to fit in with someone while all I wanted was to be accepted for who I am. My mother is an avid reader and I grew up listening to Metallica and Enigma at a young age so she heavily influenced the person you all see and know today. I also teach and preach to others, especially people of color, that it’s ok to be you. You don’t have to fall in line with other people ideals of this is how you are and should be. No. Fuck them and fuck that. Be you unapologetically.

Now, on to this story. This is a recent moment where all of her five children were home with her for the first time in a while. She liked to head to be early, and my siblings and I would fight and play around. This one weekend night we all wanted to make a cake; however, we couldn’t without getting permission to use her things first. So we all walked into her room and surrounded her bed. The only light available was the one coming from the television.

Now we all were just a little afraid of waking her up, but we really wanted some cake. One of my brothers kept whispering “ma” while the rest of us just stood quiet around the bed. It took quite a few ma’s to get her to wake up. When she finally did she screamed and jumped. It wasn’t our intention to scare her, but we were pretty amused. She didn’t know what to do after waking up in the dark with dark figures surrounding her bed. She was pretty irritated that we scared the life out of her over some cake. We still talk and joke about it to this day. Good times! Love you mudder! (I know she’s reading this haha).


Image: Pintrest